Fake animation seminar

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Posted by Clem on April 28, 1999 at 12:38:35:



Join with us in exploring and dissecting this "step child" segment of the entertainment industry. Perhaps you are already in the animation business...perhaps you would like to be. Following are some of the informative and educational seminars you may be interested in attending. A great opportunity to "schmooze" and "network" with other "like minded" and creative people.


1. From receptionist or production assistant to running your own studio. The FAST TRACK in the animation biz!

2. Knowledge and / or ability is nothing...Attitude is everything!

3. The animation division...Fallopian Siberia, or stepping stone to greater advancement in the entertainment industry?


1. Taking CHARGE at meetings, speaking with a loud, authoritative voice,
shouting down and interrupting and how these strategies always work to your advantage!

2. Advanced hallway breast beating...Let management know you really care!

3. The fine art of blaming the overseas animation studio...or why "Garbage in...Garbage out" need not apply to you!

4. Why the people in the animation business who actually know the animation
production process are dangerous to your career....and how to keep them
in line!

5. Strategies designed to help you in convincing the corporate home office that you "know everything" about the animation production process ( even
though you know absolutely nothing! ) Including: Dressing for success
....How to convince decision makers that you graduated from an Ivy League University....The advantages of plastic surgery....Advanced
sneering....Bustling....and Dismissing underlings with a glance... Working words and phrases into your vocabulary such as: "Animations", "Paradygm", "Synergy", "Story arc", "Character driven" and the old stand- by "I don't know what I want, but I'll know it when I see it."

6. An analasis of why having absolutely no creative abilities or sense of
humor is an ADVANTAGE in the animation industry!

7. How to respond to a question without really answering it. Advanced strategies include: Relying on dubious logic, maze wandering, misdirection,
gibberish and double speak techniques.

8. Why commiting to anything is CORPORATE DEATH! Including the fine art of the "vague generalization."

9. Advanced weed squatting, sniping, bushwacking, back stabbing, character
assasination, sandbagging, hallway whispering and finger pointing.

10. Learning to live by these successful mantras: "Style over substance...
gimmickry over content" and "If I say I'm creative enough times..it will become true".

11. Learning how to act like your from somewhere your not, such as New York...Europe...Israel... or the nether regions.

12. Insights into keeping artists and creative "types" in line. It's not that hard once you know what your doing....after all, their only a bunch of

13. Why an M.B.A. does mean you are creative!

14. The fine art of the overseas animation studio "kick back".

15. Strategies in convincing corporate headquarters or the board of directors that they have gotten their moneys worth. "It's moving!...It's in color!...Kids won't know the difference!...Who watches these things anyway?!"

16. Investigations into successfully paying "lip service" to educational
content in TV series animation. Disguising commercials as TV series
animation. Dodging the violence rap.

17. How to give the impression that you are in the studio, when you actually aren't!...."He's in a meeting, can he return your call?"

18. Contemporary animation studio "down sizing", retaining management staff and multiple layers of bureaucracy while at the same time eliminating the so called "creative" staff.

19. A short course in successfully managing numerous departments at the same time, while still having absolutely no idea what it is they are doing!

20. Advanced eye wash, pablum, drek creation and how insipid can you get? The fine art of playing to lowest common denominator.

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